Occasional Romantic Date For Two

Hello. I'm not going to say sorry for not posting in a while. This is our thing. I've got a wife. You're only in this for the sweet sweet dollar. I take you out occasionally for a nice meal... I say occasionally, the meals are every 6 months or so - But BOY, are those meals GREAT meals. Our blogging relationship is like being the bully at school. You pick on the fat, glasses wearing, clever, spotty kids, but occasionally you break one of their noses and you get kicked out of school. This is that. I occasionally break your nose. But in a good way. The best way.

Y'right.

Analogies. There the best. Or should I say "they're". Grammar often gets pucked up on the internet. Or should I say "picked" up. Yep, "pucked" up is wrong, your right. Or should I say "You're." Yeah, you're right. We're the same person? Why are you correcting me and then making further mistakes?

Different parts of the internet have different approaches to formality. When talking on Facebook or Twitter I don't capitalise and I often add extra exclamation points for emphasis!! That's because those sites are social networks, you're connecting as a conversation with friends and so I write in a reflection to that form. I'm putting correct. full stops. and. commas., and capitalisations in this post because I'm approaching it with a more formal style - one in which time will hopefully be set aside for.

I care for this blog more than the Tumblr one. But then I care for the cat I occasionally encounter more than the other cat I see everyday which isn't as great because it tries too hard. I know what it wants. I know I can give him that. But the occasional cat is a treat. I want to capitalise and full stop all proper so it's an event. A romantic, occasional event where magic can happen. I'm not weird with cats. Just analogies.

Also, people who choose to pick apart grammer in informal settings? Don't do that. That hasn't won you anything. And I used to be like that. I felt like a special little disabled spider in the bathtub when I saw an incorrect "your" - "oh god its my time to shine this is it all my previous mistakes have come down to this decision oh god this is it i'm ecstatic i feel like electric i can dance" and then Elton John starts playing. Arguments should be dealt with through the topic. You don't slap the toes of the bully to knock him out. You slap the cheek. The face cheek. I suppose the non-face cheek slap could also beat the bully. Not sure. Go talk to a teacher first.

Humour is a thing that's different to different people too. A definition of abnormality is deviating from social norms - Going against the majority. When you hear a not-that-funny joke people often conform and laugh, but actually disagree inside. I'm trying to change that. I occasionally walk away from social situations and think "Why did I say that?" Because the thing I said wasn't something I had said, it was something Myles-Acting-Well-In-A-Social-Situation had said. I'm aware of myself and so I should say "hey, no, that joke wasn't funny, that wasn't even a joke, you were just saying that Elton John was a 'Queen' because he's gay great stereotypes." I heard that joke about 5 times on Sunday. Sunday was the Queen of England's Diamond Jubilee: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IG8p6oYD5eU - I filmed it!

So, good, we're all caught up! I'll probably see you in October? Or December? Maybe 2014? I dunno. I'll send you a text under the name "Sarah's Work Number"

 http://youtube.com/itsamemyleo

http://twitter.com/itsamemyleo

Thanks for reading. Here's a musical recommendation - Stepdad: 

- Myles

As The Ocean Said To The Tulip-Faced-Queen

Hey! First post of 2012. Here’s some news: I’ve got a new phone and my ringtone is called “Saturday Dance Floor.” There’s a party every time it goes off on public transport and all the ladies look at me.

In other news: There was a squirrel this morning that looked directly at my dad’s car as we headed straight for it. He didn’t care. He knew that today wouldn’t be the day he died. And then I looked out the rear view mirror and it was just staring at me… Looking.

I got 'The Fault In Our Stars' yesterday, which is this new book from John Green. I started reading it and then after a chapter realized I needed to set aside a whole day for it so I could appreciate it more and follow the story clearer. So that’s going to happen tomorrow.

I also might as well mention some of my videos I’ve made recently. Some of those words will link to videos if you’re interested.

Myles Recommends: 

Try to watch the sunrise or the sunset, but don’t make a thing about it like “Look I'm watching the sun rise look how different and PRETNTIOUS TWAT I AM YOU TWAT look at the nice sun” – I’ve been doing it recently and it’s good.

There we go, I can now cross off my “Remember you have a blogger account in which you like to blog from.” reminder.

The end.

- Myles